Halloween 2010 - How I "C" it.

Every year. Every stinkin' year I get slammed with this holiday. A pagan holiday (ok - so most of them are - totally beside the point.) As luck would have it, it fell on a Sunday - so no Mt. Vernon just 20 minutes the night before at a Trunk or Treat (I've timed this perfectly to skip the insane chili dinner for 200 at the church and just show up when it's time to hit the trunks). This didn't seem to simplify anything. As with every year my kids had already worn their costumes 4 times before the BIG DAY to various events/parties/school so when it came time for the actual BIG DAY it was very anti-climatic. Since none of their costumes on the BIG DAY measured up to my high expectations they didn't get individual pictures. Ella was the only one who complied - hence the special picture with me (you see how I work?) (Also, note how I photoshopped her costume on one picture and forgot the other one :)


Now - here's where I'd like to stand on the proverbial "SUE" box and paint a lovely picture: We see the bags of candy at the store. We buy the big bag of candy at the store. We go trick or treating (or trunk or treating). We come home and let our kids pig out. I tell 'em knock yourself out - binge away - here...would you like some more? Oh you screeching little 16 month old let me put some more candy in your mouth - Rascal, you know that will make you sick right? Oh you're stomach hurts eh? TOO BAD! Try not stuffing your face with candy!! (I'm of course included in the candy binge too :) Then I calmly take the bowl of candy and dump it all in the trash the next night. Gone. Bye. Bye. None of this "candy fairy" crap (sorry I'm just channeling here...) I'm not buying anything back from my rascals (what genius KID came up with that one??) The goal is to make them puke on candy and curl up in a tight little ball begging me to make it go away. This way, they have no problems when I tell them its gone.
What sort of sick perverse world do we live in - filling our little baskets with loads of candy only to dump it all in the trash the next day?? Yeah, yeah, yeah - I'm sure there are some people out there like my aunt Marsha who can keep the little bowl of candy ALL YEAR LONG (who does that? Even with my raiding of the metal bowl on the second shelf of the dish cupboard EVERY TIME I WOULD GO TO HER HOUSE - she still seemed to have candy left!) Time to break the cycle people.
Next year - I'll "accidentally" forget the baskets - or perhaps "accidentally" throw them out the car window and then run my little tires back and forth over them as my children watch them crushed to tiny little pieces- then tell the rascals to go fill their pockets and be happy with it. Better yet - I think we're gonna skip this week next year altogether. Time to take the most PSYCHO week of the year off the calendar.
And that's how a I "C" it.

*See I can say all these things and still have a smile on my face. (Note to self: next year have Matt's costume ready - get the brown wig, sweater vest and tie all laid out so he can join the photoshoot).